Reclaiming Your Crown: 

After a Betrayal

A friend recently called me to share a painful experience. Someone she deeply trusted and cared about has been stealing money from her for months, maybe even years. It’s not just about the money, which can be replaced, but it’s the betrayal that's causing her so much stress.

When trust is broken, it can leave us feeling confused, hurt, and even questioning our worth. 

Reclaiming your crown means remembering who God is and remembering who you are. Even when others forget your worth, God never does. He is able to heal the brokenhearted and bind up their wounds (Psalm 147:3). My prayer is that you overcome betrayal not with bitterness, but with beauty.

Re-reflecting the Character of God 

God is fair and just, yet merciful. God's justice means righteousness is in place and fairness means He doesn’t play favorites. BUT, He is also merciful. Whether we like it or not, He allows forgiveness and redemption through Jesus Christ. And whether we like it or not, we, as his people, are called to reflect His character - Him being fair, just, and merciful. The LORD, in fact, requires us to act justly, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with Him, just as He already showed us what is good in Micah 6:8. 

God is also wise. I believe that God will give you peace and guidance in knowing what to do. After all, you need to retrieve what was lost, and protect what is left.

Redefining Good 

Romans 12:21 says, “Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.” Love, loyalty, and hope - these are good. But sometimes, “good” things can blind us. Good doesn’t mean tolerating what the bible calls sin. Good can look like setting healthy boundaries. Good can look like simply walking away. Good can mean prioritizing peace and your well-being. Good can mean calling out what is wrong.

I urge you to be brave. Though painful, when truth surfaces, it also brings freedom. God doesn’t shame you for being hurt. Instead, He draws closer to you in it.

Re-doing Everything in Love

“Do everything in Love.” (1 Corinthians 16:14) 

Paul, when he wrote this, was providing guidance to the church in Corinth as they faced various tensions within their community. Love (“agape” love which is selfless and sacrificial), is what sets us apart as followers of Christ. By this, agape love, everyone will know that we are His disciples. (John 13:34-35) 

Love over vengeance. I repeat. Love over vengeance. Though how unfair it is, love means still protecting the other party’s dignity by keeping matters private. In Mathew 18:15-17, Jesus instructs, "If your brother sins against you, go and confront him privately. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so that 'every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.' 

Deal with it among yourselves first. Involve someone who has an impact and can directly speak life to the person’s life. In this way, someone can help navigate this negative situation with that person, and journey with him to redemption and restoration in Christ. By any means, avoid gossip that can cause further hurt and division. 

Reconnect with Community

Yes, betrayal came through relationships, but so as healing. Through the right kind of relationships that is. Isolation may feel safe, but it keeps wounds from fully healing. Talking about the never ending cycle of overthinking, self-pity, and confusion. Vulnerability with the right people restores. It reminds us that what you feel is valid, you are not alone, and you are still worthy of love.

The truth is, you might never get the apology you want. But peace isn’t found in their remorse, but in God’s presence. The kind of peace that is real and available. The peace of God, which transcends all understanding, that guards our hearts and our minds in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:7) 

This isn’t the end of your story, it's a plot twist! Your crown may have slipped, but it hasn’t been taken. If this blog hits home, I see you. More importantly, God sees you. 

Reclaiming My Crown,

Nica 👑 

“You shall be a crown of beauty in the hand of the Lord, and a royal diadem in the hand of your God.” 

Isaiah 62:3 (ESV)